leaving the bellly. returning to the underworld.

it has been one month plus since writing. i've been inside the belly of a wolf that i love. he may have been inside my belly too. we digested each other, plain and simple. i felt him intimately and he felt me intimately. in two months, straight to the core. straight to the heart. and straight to the broken fissures and cracks. spelunking is like that...one, two, three, jump!

i know the story. alice falls down the rabbit's hole. persephone gets yanked and sleeping beauty goes to sleep. reading between the lines, it's the part in the story where transformation needs space. it's the part in the story where psyche and eros part. their parting seems to be the most tragic adventure yet to be heralded. but it's an old, ancient story, and it will continue to play itself out in new forms. whether i like it or not. psyche goes underground to persephone. for the sake of aphrodite and love. she must journey alone. eros fled. his form was glimpsed when it was supposed to remain secret. the hot wax dripped on his arm. it was psyche's fault. her curiosity led to their separation. his restrictions were kind of strange. love's curiosity compelled their story to shift...so that eros could take a time out, and so that psyche could take a time out. we do not know if she will survive the difficult tasks given to her by the goddess of love and beauty. it's time for her to do some deep work. that's the way the story goes. and grows. do it alone she must.

and eros...it doesn't really say. he'll maybe reveal his voice in song. or art. that would be nice.

so. psyche went to the underworld a couple nights ago. it was the task that was given to her by aphrodite. she discovered a new version of herself was waiting for her below...the moon and the sun...

you will notice that the little fox appears in between psyche's moon image. he's the invisible glue that keeps psyche together with the spirit of an eaglevulture. theh spirit of the eagle vulture brings new life and takes away that which is no longer needed. it is taking a part of her brain out that has had a repeating tape.

her sun is a strong kachina. a bulldeerbird kachina. truth is the medicine. it is in the exposed bones. it is raw. it is piercing like his eyes. it is true.